Spider-Man: Irresponsible/Terror from Above
Terror from Above is the fifth issue of the comic series Spider-Man: Irresponsible. Transcript A group of cheerleaders is seen practicing their cheers. *'Cheerleaders: '''Okay! alright! B-L-A-C-K, panthers fight another day! B-L-A-C-K, we're out hunting for our prey! go Panthers! Gwen and Harry are seen watching from the bleachers *'Gwen: God, who suggested that rhyme? *'''Peter: Right here. Peter is revealed to be sitting right behind them with a jar beside him. *'Gwen:' W-What? *'Peter:' What? *'Gwen:' What? *'Harry: '''Yeah, I refuse to be a part of a conversation like this so I'm changing the subject. What's up with the jar? *'Peter: Oh yeah, you guys don't know about Gwen! Peter holds up the jar, which has a large tarantula in it. * '''Gwen: Gah! Harry screams so loud and for so long the cheerleaders stop to stare at him until it slowly dies down. *'Harry: '''So you're afraid of spiders, Gwen? *'Gwen: What? I dunno what you're talking about. *'''Harry: Well, you did make that noise when Peter showed you Gwen Two. Gwen stares at Harry as if expecting him to reveal he's joking. *'Peter:' But yeah, Gwen. Hope you guys like her, she'll be living in my locker for a while. *'Gwen:' Why'd you name it after me? *'Peter:' I don't know, your name's pretty I guess. *'Gwen:' ...Uh... so why are you here anyway? *'Peter:' Red's sitting on the bottom bleachers and I'm trying to find out what she's in to. *'Harry: '''Red? *'Peter: I don't know her actual name, I just call her Red. Truth be told, it's really creepy I've been following her around and I'm a little too deep now. But I think it is worth it. *'Harry: '''What'll you do if she sees you? *'Peter: 'Run. *'Gwen: Why can't you just talk to her? *'Peter:' What do you expect me to say? the conversation would end at "hello." *'Gwen:' Just say what comes to your mind. *'Peter: '''Currently all I'm thinking about is the fact this jar is empty. Peter holds up his jar, revealing that Gwen has escaped. Harry stares at it before getting up and running away in terror. *'Peter: I don't get what his problem is, tarantulas aren't venomous. It suddenly cuts to a large truck which has a small group of men in plague doctor-like masks inside. One of them is wearing armor and a metal version of the mask, which opens up, revealing his face as he blows a bubble with his gum before spitting it out and sticking it to the bottom of his boot. * '''Vulture: Here we are boys. Never actually thought we'd make it this far. * Henchman #1: I'm still not convinced this is a good idea, Vulture. * Vulture: Man, shut up. Blokes like you are always talking back to their boss. And I have no place in my army for guys that don't trust their superiors. You know, I keep using words like "guys" and "boys" but I just realized there might be women here... raise your hand if you're a girl! Nobody raises their hand. *'Vulture: '''No girls at all? wow... I never noticed that before. If any of you guys die, I might have to replace you with a girl. Now arm yourselves, boys! Midtown High, here we come! They all pick up their weapons as Vulture's mask lowers again and his wings pop. It then cuts back to Midtown High, where Peter is seen in the showers with his phone out. He looks to his right and sees Flash and a few other students staring at him. *'Peter:' Waterproof phone. *'Flash:' You realize the showers are made for people on the football team only, right? *'Peter:' And? Are you saying I can't join the football team? I sure as hell could get on a lot faster than you did. Gwen pops her head over a small wall in front of the boys. *'Gwen: Oh, you feel that Flash? that's the pain of a third-degree burn! *'''Flash: '''Why is there no wall between the men's and women's showers!? They all hear a loud noise and quickly get dressed and run out, seeing a large crowd gathered in front of something. Peter attempts to walk towards it but, out of nowhere, there's an explosion that sends some people flying backward as the men in masks rush into Midtown High, Vulture hovering above them. * '''Flash: What the hell? Vulture's mask lifts. *'Vulture: '''Very nice to meet you all, my name is Blackie Drago! I'm better known as Vulture. I'm very sorry for the inconvenience, I know it's a bad time for a break in. I mean, some of you probably just got outta the shower! But I am here to hold you all hostage. *'Peter:' Why? *'Vulture: Oh, I'm sorry, did somebody just ask why? hm, well, let me think, it couldn't possibly have anything to do with the fact this is a really expensive school, or that most people who go here have rich and/or important. Or the fact the richest man in the city's son goes here. Or the fact that the captain of the NYPD's daughter goes here. Or the fact that-- *'''Peter: Okay, okay, I get it... everyone here is rich, except for me. *'Flesh:' I'm not rich either! *'Vulture: '''Well then, sad to say, but you're probably never going to get to see your parents again. *'Peter:' Good thing my parents are dead. *'Vulture:' ...This has suddenly gotten very awkward and I'd like to change the subject. Vulture shoots the sky, a yellow beam firing from his gun. *'Vulture:' How about everybody getting on the ground for a topic!? In fear they do. *'Peter (narration):' Well, at least he actually has motives and I'm not dealing with another unreasonable lunatic... but he does need to be stopped. Now, how do I get up without any of them noticing...? *'Vulture:' Ah! spider! The henchmen turn to Vulture, who sees Gwen crawl into a vent. *'Vulture: There're freakin' spiders in here!? what the hell!? Peter shuffles away in the confusion. * '''Vulture: Kill it! He shoots the vent. Peter is then shown putting on his suit and running through the hallway. *'Peter (narration):' Okay, how do you beat a man with an army that can fly and shoot lasers? huh... new sentence... maybe I remove the wings? his wings looked like they were made of steel. Can I break steel? well, guess this is the day I find out. Peter turns a corner and it cuts back to Vulture, who sees a student holding something and snatches it away. *'Vulture: '''What the hell is this? Vulture looks at it, revealing it to be an e-cig. *'Vulture: Oh, one of these gay things, eh? *'''Student: You shouldn't use that word that way. Vulture looks at the student and begins using the e-cig, remaining quiet as he does. Suddenly, Peter rushes in. *'Vulture: '''What the hell? Peter attempts to tackle Vulture, who nonchalantly blasts him with his gun. Peter manages to get up, though his legs wobble as he does. *'Peter: Okay... that probably wasn't my best idea... *'''Vulture: Aha! *'Peter:' What the hell? was that how you laugh? sounded like you just found the last clue in a murder case. *'Vulture:' Quiet, Captain Spandex! *'Peter: It's Spider-Man.' *'Vulture: '''Who? *'Henchman #2:' ...Boss, do you honestly not know who Spider-Man is? *'Vulture: Should I? *'''Henchman #1: If you want to live *'Peter:' Yeah, I'm a pretty big deal. Peter puts his hands behind his head, faking a stretch. *'Vulture:' ...Are you flexing? why're you flexing? I can flex too. *'Henchman #1:' Why are you bragging about your muscles to what is obviously a kid? Vulture shoots the henchman. *'Vulture: '''So Mr. Man, what exactly are you doing here? by the way, has anybody here ever read the Mister Men books? those were great when I was a kid. *'Peter:' Never read it. And I'm here to stop you. *'Vulture: ...Uhuh... *'''Peter: Wow, you are literally the first villain I've ever met who didn't take me seriously even in the slightest... god... *'Vulture:' You know what, I don't really feel like doing this right now. Boys, kill this tosser. *'Henchman #3:' But he's... Vulture gestures over to the dead body of the henchman he shot, which causes his men to pull out their guns and begin firing, Peter dodging the shots and continuously jumping and running around the room. *'Peter (narration): '''Crap, I can't dodge forever. Sad to say, but I think retreating is the only way I can get out of this alive. Peter leaps into the now blasted open vent and begins crawling away. * '''Vulture:' I want you to find and kill him. * Henchman #4: '''Which one of us? * '''Vulture: Uh... maybe half the guys in the room. Half of the henchmen leave to search for Spider-Man. *'Vulture: '''Now, if you'll excuse me, I have someone I need to talk to. Vulture walks outside and speaks to someone on the phone. *'Vulture:' Good morning! how might you be this fine day? The person on the other end of the phone is revealed to be the mysterious man. *'Mysterious Man: Where you arrested? *Vulture: What? no. But I do still need some help. See, this bloke named Spider-Man showed up and, apparently, he's a big deal so I'd appreciate if you sent down someone to-- *'''Mysterious Man: Spider-Man? *'Vulture:' Yeah. The man hangs up. *'Vulture:' ...Hello? The mysterious man puts down his phone and gets up out of his chair, turning off his computer screen. *'Mysterious Man': Everyone, I'm heading down to Midtown High. Keep the lab tidy while I'm out.